My Journal

The other day, I had an assignment that require me to ask one question, any question to my fellow classmates, and after that answer their questions. The one question that caught my attention was "What's your biggest fear?". Although, this a pretty common questions it still made me think. At the time, I couldn't think of anything, so I just put down heights. I read some of my other classmate's fears and I realized what my biggest fear was/is. My biggest fear is losing my parents or anyone close to me.

I have never lost anyone close to me by death, at least not yet. That's what scares me. Both my grandparents are getting older, and before I know it they may not be on earth anymore. I know a girl whose parents both passed away. I wanted to help her somehow, but I didn't know how to, because I honestly did not know what she was going through. I couldn't relate to her at all, and that mad me feel useless.

As a Christian, I shouldn't have this fear. This may sound strange, but I should be glad that they have passed on and ended this suffering, and are now in heaven. I suppose it's kind of selfish of me. I want to keep them all to myself on earth, rather than wanting them to leave and go to heaven. I really should be happy for them. Their misery is put to an end and they are rejoicing in heaven.

I did not mean for this blog post to be religious. However, it would have been hard for me not to. I've leaned that my biggest fear is basically based on selfishness. Not exactly what I wanted it to be. Oh well, I guess I will have to deal with it the rest of the time I'm on earth.